When my husband and I started to practice Kundalini yoga, I was introduced to women who lived their lives to a completely different drummer.  Not only were these women happy, just to be in their presence felt calming and refreshing.  I had never met women that had such presence and personal strength.  They seemed elegant and completely confident in their skin.  They had no need to show themselves off.  The mere fact that they were so comfortable in their own skin, made them glow with radiance and I yearned to understand how I could be like these women.  All I knew was, they understood something that I had yet to learn.

For years I’d spend hours putting on my make up, straightening or curling my hair, and picking out just the right outfit, one that was cute and showed off just the right parts.  In fact, I did this every day for about an hour, sometimes more.  But who was I really doing this for?   For myself?   Or was it to look a certain way that would earn the approval of everyone around me?

At the time I didn’t realize it, but I did it for the approval of others.  And many women do the same!  Don’t get me wrong.  There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look good or taking pride in your appearance.  But here’s the thing… as women, many of us have forgotten that we are truly beautiful without all the make up, and without showing off our bodies.

Do you ever spend a long time making yourself beautiful only to feel unsatisfied with your appearance?  I received attention and approval but I still felt like something was missing.  Why was something missing?   Because I hadn’t yet approved of myself.  The approval from others would never fill that gap.  And make up or  cute outfit could never do the trick.   Just being around these women made me want to make a change in my life
So what did I do?  I literally went into my closet, tore down all my clothes except for a few shirts and pants, boxed it all up and sold all of it.  And I’m not talking about cheap clothes.  I got rid of BEBE, Guess, Ed Hardey, Coach, etc.  Now my closet was bare.  It felt like I had completed a cleanse.  I was actually shedding clothes that to me symbolized a person I no longer was.  I was ready to grow up and become the woman that was inside of me all along.  And to do that I needed to make changes on the inside and outside.

I started buying up some new flowing skirts and wraps.  I stopped wearing so much make up and wore my smile instead.  I started wearing beautiful scarves in my hair.  Now it takes me ten minutes to get ready.  I feel better, I look better, and I’m MUCH happier.  Yes, it took a lot of courage and it did take some time to get used to my new appearance.  People were used to seeing me a certain way.  But after a few months, I got used to my new identity and it felt good, really good.

My husband is happier too.  He says I take less time to get ready.   He never hears me say my hair looks bad, and I don’t come to him seeking praise of how I look each day.

I know this may seem extreme to some of you, to actually get rid of all your clothes.  You may be thinking you could never do something like that.  But you don’t have to go as extreme as I did.  I just did what worked for me.  Try wearing a little less make up, do your hair In a pretty way that you like, and try wearing clothes that are not as tight or revealing.  Maybe wear a longer feminine skirt, a blouse that makes you feel beautiful, or a colorful scarf.  There are so many beautiful options for feminine flowing clothing nowadays.  Find your own niche!

It’s all about being you, not a replica of someone else.  If you feel feminine and lovely, then you’re on the right track!  Be brave and take a chance.  It can only benefit you.  Try this out and see how you can apply it to your life.  Remember you don’t have to change your whole wardrobe. You can simply add to it or simplify it.  Have fun with this and remember how special you are!

Filed under: Body Image of Women

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