When my husband and I started to practice Kundalini yoga, I was introduced to women who lived their lives to a completely different drummer.  Not only were these women happy, just to be in their presence felt calming and refreshing.  I had never met women that had such presence and personal strength.  They seemed elegant and completely confident in their skin.  They had no need to show themselves off.  The mere fact that they were so comfortable in their own skin, made them glow with radiance and I yearned to understand how I could be like these women.  All I knew was, they understood something that I had yet to learn.

For years I’d spend hours putting on my make up, straightening or curling my hair, and picking out just the right outfit, one that was cute and showed off just the right parts.  In fact, I did this every day for about an hour, sometimes more.  But who was I really doing this for?   For myself?   Or was it to look a certain way that would earn the approval of everyone around me?

At the time I didn’t realize it, but I did it for the approval of others.  And many women do the same!  Don’t get me wrong.  There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look good or taking pride in your appearance.  But here’s the thing… as women, many of us have forgotten that we are truly beautiful without all the make up, and without showing off our bodies.

Do you ever spend a long time making yourself beautiful only to feel unsatisfied with your appearance?  I received attention and approval but I still felt like something was missing.  Why was something missing?   Because I hadn’t yet approved of myself.  The approval from others would never fill that gap.  And make up or  cute outfit could never do the trick.   Just being around these women made me want to make a change in my life
So what did I do?  I literally went into my closet, tore down all my clothes except for a few shirts and pants, boxed it all up and sold all of it.  And I’m not talking about cheap clothes.  I got rid of BEBE, Guess, Ed Hardey, Coach, etc.  Now my closet was bare.  It felt like I had completed a cleanse.  I was actually shedding clothes that to me symbolized a person I no longer was.  I was ready to grow up and become the woman that was inside of me all along.  And to do that I needed to make changes on the inside and outside.

I started buying up some new flowing skirts and wraps.  I stopped wearing so much make up and wore my smile instead.  I started wearing beautiful scarves in my hair.  Now it takes me ten minutes to get ready.  I feel better, I look better, and I’m MUCH happier.  Yes, it took a lot of courage and it did take some time to get used to my new appearance.  People were used to seeing me a certain way.  But after a few months, I got used to my new identity and it felt good, really good.

My husband is happier too.  He says I take less time to get ready.   He never hears me say my hair looks bad, and I don’t come to him seeking praise of how I look each day.

I know this may seem extreme to some of you, to actually get rid of all your clothes.  You may be thinking you could never do something like that.  But you don’t have to go as extreme as I did.  I just did what worked for me.  Try wearing a little less make up, do your hair In a pretty way that you like, and try wearing clothes that are not as tight or revealing.  Maybe wear a longer feminine skirt, a blouse that makes you feel beautiful, or a colorful scarf.  There are so many beautiful options for feminine flowing clothing nowadays.  Find your own niche!

It’s all about being you, not a replica of someone else.  If you feel feminine and lovely, then you’re on the right track!  Be brave and take a chance.  It can only benefit you.  Try this out and see how you can apply it to your life.  Remember you don’t have to change your whole wardrobe. You can simply add to it or simplify it.  Have fun with this and remember how special you are!

When I think about the female body, I know it is so beautiful.  When God made a woman, she did a great job.  It’s like a piece of gorgeous art.

I was listening to some young teens talking a few days ago.  I could hear they were talking about sex and their boy friends. I was very happy to hear what they had to say.  One of the girls said she was going to wait until she was married to have sex, and the other girl agreed.  They sounded so sure of themselves!  I have to admit I was surprised because I’ve heard more stories about teens having sex, than not having sex.

Those girls probably don’t even know how awesome of a decision they are making, and provided that they follow through with it, their journey as an adult woman will be much smoother.

A women’s body is of course very different from that of a man’s body.  In yoga we understand that a woman and man have an arc of energy that goes from shoulder to shoulder, above the head.  But a woman has one more, and it’s very important.  This arc of energy goes from shoulder to shoulder across her chest.  A man does not have this arc.  Within this arc she holds all of her sexual experiences.

When she is sexually active with a man he is permanently imprinted on her arc of energy.  She takes on a part of his Karma.  When you look at this deeper it really makes sense.  Think about prostitutes…  these women, for the most part are in mental disarray.  These women’s lives are not stable, they don’t feel good about who they are, and the list goes on.  No wonder, they have taken on so many sexual partners. They have been imprinted by so many men, and now they can’t find themselves amongst all of this.

I feel it is our duty and our honor to cherish our Sacred Body.  You are a woman, you are a role model for all young women who have yet to reach adulthood.  With so many teens having sex so young, how cool would it be to share this wisdom with them?

Even if you were sexually active with men out of marriage, in your past, or perhaps you are now, you can make the change now.  Your body is so special and I believe it should not be given so easily.  And don’t ever forget how Sacred you are.

Have you ever been told not to talk to strangers?  It’s the thing most of us hear from the adults in our life when we are kids.  During a talk with my teacher Guru Singh, he said, “Every person I encounter is either my brother/sister, or my son/daughter.”  This totally changes your relationship with the people you encounter each day.

Not only does it create a sense of love and respect for each person, but it makes you feel responsible for the way you react when you encounter anyone in your life, or the way you handle that relationship.  It’s the realization that no one is a stranger.  We are all intertwined!

Do you ever find yourself getting into gossipy conversations about other people?  If everyone is a son/daughter, or a brother/sister to us, then why would we ever want to hurt someone or gossip about them?  They are a part of us.  It’s like hurting ourselves.

In understanding this lesson, we can practice love for every person and refuse to speak about other people behind their backs.  I guess that old saying is true, treat others as you wish to be treated.  And be impeccable with your word.

I first knew Gurmukh as an author.  I had become pregnant with our third child and wanted to find a great Prenatal yoga book.  There she was on the front cover of her book Bountiful, Beautiful, Blissful.  She was surrounded by pregnant mommies all looking happy and blissful.  I couldn’t wait to receive her book in the mail.  As I began to read there was a short story of her life.  I could relate to her life journey.  I too had dealed with my own sorts of addictions and decided to take a spiritual path that changed my life for the better.

Her book beautifully laid out teachings and special meditations for each stage of pregnancy.  I was my pregnancy hand book every step of  the way.  It was filled with ancient teachings taught for modern women!  And I truly felt bountiful, beautiful, blissful.

Her influence changed my perception of being a woman.  I decided on complete natural child birth and I was able to tap into my own inner strength.

As of now I’ve not met Gurmukh.  But she has made her impression on me through her books, online lectures, and online meditations.  This is the power of the sacred circle.  Choosing a woman role model that will empower you to live at a higher standard.

To me she is a teacher of commitment, grace, and transformation.

This is one of my very favorite pictures.  I love to see such a elegant woman standing as a warrior in her life.  I believe whole heartedly that every woman is a warrior, even if she hasen’t discovered it yet, that warrior is always knocking, waiting for a chance to come out.

In my own life I stand up and fight every day.  No I don’t stand up with a sward and fight to the death, I stand and up and fight for my family for what I believe in.  My choice to home school my children is my form of fighting as a warrior for my kids, my choice to be totally committed to my husband is my form of fighting for my husband.  There are so many ways that we stand up as warriors, it’s not the actual act of battling with weapons, it’s being on the so called battle field of life, not allowing outside forces to overcome you and negatively effect you and your life.

I suppose you could call this Courage!

When you hear the word Courage, what does it mean to you?  What does it mean to be a courageous person?  Perhaps it’s someone who takes charge, takes action, and moves forward no matter what gets in the way.

Those things are all true but what does the word Courage really mean?  The word courage is derived from the Latin Language, the word means core.  And what is your core, it’s your heart.  So courage means to live from your core, “your heart.”

To have courage in your life means you decide to move forward and grow in your life.  This doesn’t mean things won’t get in your way, or should I say try to get in your way.  Of course you will have challenges, in fact the more courage you have, and the more you grow in life, the more resistance you will feel.  But having courage means you do it anyways, and your begin to expand and grow as a person.

“We must protect the forests for our children, grandchildren and children yet to be born. We must protect the forests for those who can’t speak for themselves such as the birds, animals, fish and trees.”

I can still remember my first experience with Kundalini yoga.  I had always worked out and taken care of myself but this was something completely different.  I knew immediately that I had discovered something that would change my life, and it has.
I personally chose to practice Kundalini Yoga.  I love one of the most simple yet profound teachings, “The highest for of enlightenment is to be an enlightened house holder.  Anyone can escape to the mountains to meditate but if you can live a meditative life amongst the hustle and bustle of this modern world then that is ture mastery.”  We need more people who live mediative life styles and help to teach all the other humans how to do so.  It’s living through example.

With this practice,  I’ve seen my life and my family life transform in so many ways.  It’s become a way of life for my husband and I.  And each morning we rise before the sun comes up with our children to do some yoga and meditation.  It’s the best way to start every day.  Yoga gets your energy moving, balances your body, and helps you to be in a state of clarity. You gain inner vitality to compensate for the effects of stress so you can grow in life.

Kundalini Yoga can be done any time of the day, but when done first thing in the morning before the sun rises, it sets your body and mind straight before the hustle and bustle of the day.  It’s your time to connect with yourself when the Earth feels peaceful and quiet.   Instead of starting off your day jumping out of bed and topping it off with a jolt of coffee, you can use this powerful tool you were blessed with (your body) to awaken the energy that is your life force.  It brings out the best of you and helps you deal with the day ahead of you.

I encourage you to pick up a good book or research on the web.  You can find so much information about Kundalini Yoga online.  You can even find a great local class. There are yoga studios all over.  Check out SpiritVoyage.com  for some really great audios and books.

Our son Bodhi will be one on Tuesday.  As I reflect back upon this year I can only smile.  This year has flown by, we’ve watched him transform from a small fragile baby and into a active and energetic toddler, curious about the world and everything in it.

We decided to raise Bodhi differently, we had learned some very special lessons over the years and couldn’t wait to use them during the pregnancy and over the first years.  I think the three most important lessons are these.

1.  The family bed and use of baby slings:  The family bed is where you keep your baby in bed with you at night.  Forget buying a fancy crib, you don’t need it because the best place for baby is right in bed with you cuddling in your arms.  If you think about it this really makes sense.  A baby is warm inside your womb for nine months, then the baby is born and expected to sleep happy and securely in a crib, all alone.  This kinds of sounds like baby torture.  We also used a baby sling from day 1.  I’ve used our stroller a few times, Bodhi loves to be wrapped up in the sling and cozy by my body.  In fact in most countries you never see a baby pushed around in a stroller, baby is always somewhere on moms body, either on the back or on the front.

2.  The 40 day blessing:  This is a Kundalini Yoga Practice.  Once a baby is born the baby is not done baking.  It takes 40 days for their energetic aura to be established.  Because of this the baby will thrive like you don’t believe if kept close to mom for the 40 days after birth.  We kept Bodhi close to me, within 20 feet of my body so he was within my own bodies energetic Aura.  We did our best to have quiet, I didn’t leave the house at all with him instep for a quiet walk in the afternoon.  As far as family, we made it know to all our family and friends that we were doing THIS.  Only our closest family came to see him, my mom and dad, my brother, and my in laws.  Only after doing it was I able to see first hand the positive affects of this.  Not only was it good for me and my recovery after birth, but his security and comfort with the world flourished after being kept so close and safe for those 40 days.  I suggest any pregnant mama to try this, it’s so worth it.

3.  breast feeding with love:  No excuses, breast feeding is the best thing for a baby.  In Kundalini Yoga there is a practice to nurse your baby for 2 years and so that is what we are doing.  There’s nothing like cuddling up with Bodhi and feeding him, knowing that my body is providing all the nutrition he needs.  Of course he’s eating food now too, in fact right now he’s toddling around the house with a big apple in his little hands. Yesterday he had a cookie for the first time and his eyes were wide open the whole time, he was so happy!!!

So again I reflect on the past year, the choices made to provide the best life for our Bodhi.  I’m so happy that we chose to do what we did becasue a year has gone by, so fast, and we will never get it back.  Staying home for 40 days was worth it, sleeping with him in between my husband and I is worth it, and taking th time to nurse him is so woth it.

Thank God for the chance to be a mother of a son.

Being a mother is so many things.  At times it’s glorious, blissful, tender, and sometimes challenging, confusing, and frustrating.  My husband and I have three healthy and happy children, two girls and one baby boy.  Each child is as unique and different as the next, isn’t God great!  I think one of the most important and challenging things is to be a conscious and grown up parent.  For instance, I know it’s not good to yell at our children but what about those days that your exhausted, the house is a mess, and your kids still find a way to make even more of a mess by getting into the fridge to have a tea party, and leave a mess of crumbs behind them.  I will admit I do my very best to hold my tounge, be the adult, talk calmly to them about the situations, but there are those times that with all my practice I still burst out with holaring.

Truly when a mother hollers it’s really a cry for, “please someone come and help me.”  Yes being a mom is quit an experience, it manages to teach us and stretch is in so many ways.  I heard a quote once that I might be getting wrong here but it went something like this, “Parents don’t raise children into adults, children raise their parents into adults.”  I feel this to be true!  When I reflect back on the growth my husband and I have gone through in the past 8 years of parenting it is clear that they have taught us almost more about life than we have taught them, LOL!!!

Today was particularly a challenging day for me as a mother, we all just got over the flue so I was still very tired, we just began a more stricked home school schedule so the pressure was on with that too, and I just felt out of sorts.  It wasn’t until I sat down and did a meditation that is was able to see and feel clearly.  My intuition says, “One step at a time, be still, and just be with your children.”  And so I will take my own advice.  I will just allow myself to be with my kids, no expectations.

I suppose that is the best advice I could give myself on those challaning days as a mother.  Instead of holding so many expectations, just let go and give attention and love to those little ones surrounding me.